Director: Kris McManus
Cast: Celia Muir, Brian Levine, Lee Cheney, Darren Bransford, Kate Lousta, James Privett
Certificate: 18
Running time: 88 minutes
When an experienced assassin attempts to begin his retirement in the South of France, a lairy gang of Brits drag him back into the life he’s trying to leave behind. Directed by Kris McManus and starring Brian Levine, Celia Muir, and Lee Cheney — read our interview with him here — DEAD IN FRANCE is a black-and-white gangster thriller with one hell of a colourful cast.
Charles is a hitman growing tired of ‘hunting big game’ and opts for a quiet life in a French villa. He begins his final day as a hired gun by hiring cleaner Lisa and setting off to tie up loose ends. Collecting a sum of $2 million from an old friend, he’s quickly conned out of his cash and sets out to get it back while Lisa’s boyfriend starts up a poorly thought out con of his own. Meanwhile, in the UK Charles’ rival Clancy heads to France to finish him off…
An independent release, DEAD IN FRANCE uses its limited budget well. Sure, the effects can be slightly jarring but from the word ‘go’ — or more accurately ‘merde!’ — we see that this is a gangster film that doesn’t take itself seriously, as a Frenchman plummets down a cliffside like he’s Homer Simpson. This tongue-in-cheek humour is the movies main draw and offers up some snappy lines of dialogue. My personal favourite? ‘I’ve got my shit kids for the weekend.’
It’s the cast that carry this film, and if you can tolerate such a crass bunch for 88 minutes then you’ll enjoy yourself. Celia Muir’s Lisa is a loud-mouthed, straight-talking wonder. (Lisa’s views on romance? ‘Bit gay, innit.’) How she wrangled this job as a cleaner I’ll never know, as she spends her time shagging and trying on clothes she stumbles across. Not to mention the con she has going on with batshit crazy boyfriend Denny.
Played with vigour by Darren Bransford, Denny is a trigger-happy lunatic with the IQ of a puddle of piss. A plan to ‘rent out’ Charles’ house and escape with the money turns into a hostage situation out of nowhere, and somehow leads Denny to shooting a cat for fun. It gets weird.
Lee Cheney stars in his first feature film as Simon, a con-man who’s introduced giving his best ‘gap-yah’ voice. Simon fancies himself as a ladies man despite the fact that women seem to hate him, including his own mum. Cheney throws himself into the role with confidence and his cocky character works best opposite straight-man Charles. ‘I used to be like you’, says Charles, ‘Cheeky bastard. Hair.’
Unfortunately, it’s Brian Levine’s Charles that can be the weak link. A scene in which we see Charles at work — shooting chav after chav in the face without stopping for breath — gives him some credibility, but I just don’t buy his hitman persona. Plus a claim that he’s avoided kissing women as he ‘doesn’t like germs’ is just odd, and his growing infatuation with Lisa more-so. Kate Lousta as hitwoman Clancy, on the other hand, has the crazed gun-for-hire thing down. If she isn’t stabbing people with ball-point pens and calling them cunts, she’s getting eaten out or shooting someone in the face. My kind of woman!
Overall, DEAD IN FRANCE is a fun watch best served with a group of lads and a couple of cans. It’s full of laddish ‘banter’, shoot-outs and quick one-liners that won’t appeal to all, but offers a mindless distraction with some decent laughs. The DVD extras provide a few deleted scenes with commentary and a lengthy Gag Reel which gives us Cheney’s Christian Bale impression (‘What don’t you fucking understand? Oh good!’).
DEAD IN FRANCE is available to buy now.
