Grown Ups 2 Review

Director: Dennis Dugan.

Cast: Adam Sandler, David Spade, Chris Rock, Kevin James, Salma Hayek, Maya Rudolph, Maria Bello, Nick Swardson, Steve Buscemi, Colin Quinn, Taylor Lautner, Tim Meadows, Jon Lovitz, Shaquille O’Neal, Steve Austin.

Running Time: 101 minutes.

Certificate: 12A.

Synopsis: The guys from GROWN UPS have moved back to their hometown. GROWN UPS 2 charts a day in their lives.

If Rob Schneider can’t find the time to return for even a brief cameo, then perhaps this is a film not worth making. The preceding statement should be a written Hollywood law and, if nothing else, Schneider’s absence highlights exactly how lazy this film is due to the fact the JUDGE DREDD references remain intact. GROWN UPS 2 is one of the laziest films to ever be placed upon the silver screen. Whether it’s the acting, writing, or non-existent story (which explains the vague synopsis above), GROWN UPS 2 aims low and has difficulty with that.

As mentioned before, the plot is non-existent. Four of the five guys and their families from the first film return to their hometown to partake in a series of unrelated skits over the course of a single day. You get to see the wives meet their new gay aerobics instructor, David Spade meets his long-lost son, Kevin James is hiding the fact he goes to see his mother every day, the children are facing their last day of school, there’s a sexy ballet teacher, Stone Cold Steve Austin as Sandler’s old nemesis, two incompetent police officers, a driving test, and some other stuff too. If this sounds like a list of events then that is because that is exactly what this film is. It doesn’t even have a beginning, it just starts. It could be forgiven if these sketches were funny, but other than a few one liners, most viewers will simply be left confused.

Not only is there no story, but there’s also no effort. God bless editor Tom Costain who struggles to decide where a joke begins and ends. This isn’t his fault in the slightest, but more due to the fact that the improv skills of the main cast are far from stellar, which probably explains why the scripted moments with the child actors work so much better. The kids clearly have direction, whereas Sandler and co. stand or sit around making pitiful small talk which would only ever be funny if you were a part of their gang. Forget punchlines, parody, witty observations, or wordplay; this is the new form of comedy we like to call ‘chit-chat’. It’s actually offensive how little the stars of this film are onscreen for. Assuming the top billed actors pocketed millions, it is the kids who do a lot more work and seem to care about what they are doing. Rather than do any work themselves, an extensive list of cameo appearances are dragged out to add some life to proceedings, with Taylor Lautner, basketball star Shaquille O’Neill and wrestler Stone Cold Steve Austin hamming it up and busting their balls to get a laugh – which they do manage on occasion.

As the film bounces around without a care in the world, it becomes clear that this was written with the ‘…and then…’ guidebook to screenplays – “…and then this happens and then he does this and then…” As a final insult, the film leaves the audience confused and baffled by its complete lack of focus and confusing messages. For some reason which is never explained or developed, one child from each family proves themselves a prodigy at sport, music, or singing. These skills are never mentioned again and seem to suggest that talented people are born that way, end of. Despite all this, the film does manage a few laughs and it’s hard to hate something this harmless and carefree. If the stars want to make a quick few bucks hanging around with their friends, then who can blame them? It may be pointless, but it’s also forgettable, which is probably the film’s one saving grace.

GROWN UPS 2 is released in UK cinemas today.