Pixels review: A surprising lack of nostalgia, no real heart, and an edge of misplaced snarkiness – too many negatives to be gobbled up by a giant, hungry Pac-Man.
Pixels review
With a repertoire that boasts Home Alone, Mrs. Doubtfire, and the first two Harry Potter films, audiences should be happy to journey with a director like Chris Columbus. Throw in the added joy of retro arcade action in all of its colourful 3D loveliness, with more than a dash of inspiration from an excellent indie short (by Patrick Jean), and surely we have the perfect recipe for a generous dollop of family fun.
…Or perhaps not. While Pixels‘ neon laden action scenes are fleetingly fun, in the quieter moments it is sadly lacking. It’s difficult to ascertain who this film is actually for. With a 12A certificate, the humour needs to be far more sophisticated- There are plenty of attempts at adult jokes, but they’re mostly mean, weak, and lacking in subtlety- alienating kids and parents alike.
The film opens strongly enough; an ’80s vibe complete with Asteroids themed titles welcomes us in, while best friends Brenner and Cooper, compete at an arcade gaming contest. Brenner faces his gaming nemesis, Eddie (Peter Dinklage) in the Donkey Kong final. After the contest a capsule is sent to outer space containing a collection of arcade gaming favourites including Pacman, Donkey Kong, and Centipede.
Pixels review
We’re then plonked in the present day, where Brenner has annoyingly grown up to be Adam Sandler, and Eddie continues to be played by Peter Dinklage, who strangely seems to be channelling some kind of low-rent pantomime villain throughout. It falls on these two expert arcade gamers to save the world as a gauntlet of real life retro games are laid down by Aliens, who confuse a friendly gift as a declaration of pixelated war.
It’s a silly setup, but one with the potential to be fun. Unfortunately, the plot is circumstantial even for young minds, with Brenner’s chubby childhood chum contriving to be president of the USA, while Brenner is down on his luck as a home tech installer (They’re still best buds though). Furthermore, at a moment of crisis when the president requires his tech savvy buddy at the White House, Brenner just happens to be rigging up an entertainment system for the president’s Lieutenant Corporal (Michelle Monaghan).
There are also some cringe worthy comedy missteps such as a visit to England, which comes complete with well trodden stereotypes and a portrayal of a Prime Minister that’s so lazy and tiresome it’ll make you wish the British Isles were immediately crushed by a giant Tetrimino, smashed into a billion pixel pieces, and sunk to the bottom of the sea. Women are strangely represented too, with Michelle Monaghan‘s character unfairly tarred with the bitch brush because she doesn’t instantly succumb to that weird baby voice that Adam Sandler seems to think is alluring.
Pixels review
Sadly, Sandler seems disinterested throughout, and we neither get the zany, shouty Sandler of Happy Gilmore, nor the brooding, sad Sandler of Funny People. Instead, we’re lumbered with an even more annoying lump of apathy in between; A middle of the road Sandler that delivers half-cooked quips about not brushing his teeth with a world weary whimsy. Brenner’s go to zinger for those that belittle his career choice and role in saving the world seems to be calling them by the name of an unflattering celebrity and leaving the room.
This is a classic case of a film that should have been better, especially considering the rich source material. There is a surprising lack of nostalgia, no real heart, and an edge of misplaced snarkiness – too many negatives to be gobbled up by a giant, hungry Pac-Man.
Check this out if you absolutely must, but prepare to be annoyed that you didn’t spend the cash on a retro games compendium instead. Where in the past Chris Columbus has undoubtedly delivered some multi-levelled, timeless movies with careful consideration for people of all ages, here he’s just button bashing.
Pixels review by Dave Bennett, August 2015.
Pixels opens in UK cinemas from Wednesday 12th August 2015.
