Written and directed by Kate Dolan, You Are Not My Mother is an excellent new addition to the ever expanding branch of Irish folk horror. Set in a North Dublin council estate, You Are Not My Mother follows teenager Char (Hazel Doupe) as she faces the traumatic idea that her mother may no longer be entirely herself. Dolan gets off to a bold and brutal beginning as a baby is stolen and placed into a barbaric ritual. It instantly commands audience attention and declares that there won’t be any safe spaces for the viewer to hide in what will follow.
From the startling and confronting opening, You Are Not My Mother changes tact and simmers down, settling into a more traditional coming-of-age drama as the audience gets a glimpse into Char’s life. Char lives with both her grandmother and mother, with her uncle just down the road. The intimate set-up isn’t conducive to a happy home though as Char’s mum is almost bedridden with depression. Things outside of the home aren’t any better. Char has been moved up a year at school and her keen intellect is seen as a threat by her new classmates; the result is a regular schedule of vicious torment. It’s a lot of pain for one so young to handle and the young girl is approaching breaking point. So when her mother vanishes suddenly she is distraught. Despite her young years, Hazel Doupe has been acting for most of the last decade, her experiences building up the confidence and maturity required to handle such an emotionally complex character. Char has a lot of baggage and weight upon her soul, and Doupe expertly traverses all of this to create a character that can stand apart from her tragic circumstances.
There are plenty of stories that see parents confronted with the nightmare scenario that their beloved child may no longer be the same. It’s not often however, that the tables get turned and place a child in the position of being uncertain about the validity of their parentage. It makes for an uncomfortable situation, as parents are meant to be the constant in a child’s life. What makes You Are Not My Mother a little different though is that even before the potential change, Char’s mother isn’t the secure parental figure that she should be. An emotionally distant parent is one that many children grow up with and Dolan explores that complex mixture of emotions that comes with having such an experience. What’s more, some of the changes in Char’s mother’s behaviour could be seen as positive improvements, and so having to revert back to the status quo is an extra daunting prospect.
Behind the cloud of emotions You Are Not My Mother also remains a film that constantly keeps the viewer afraid of what is coming. After that strong opening scene the audience is aware of how far Dolan will go and that fear seeps in, making even the more ordinary moments feel eerie. So when Dolan does commit to the scary moments, they really pay off. The breaking of the tension spikes the adrenaline and there really isn’t a single instance for the viewer to relax.
The only troubling aspect of Dolan’s debut is the title, and it is one that will only affect those familiar with British soap opera Eastenders. The name You Are Not My Mother is intrinsically linked to an iconic moment in the soap wherein the true identity of Zoe Slater’s mother is revealed. It’s a slight niggle and purely an unfortunate coincidence, though once that scene is in your head, it’s hard to think of the film without replaying that moment. Anyone outside of the Eastenders fanbase will have no such issue, but it’s worth forewarning those that do remember that big revelation not to scream out “yes I am” as the tite card appears.
A marvel of a movie at any stage in someone’s career, the fact that You Are Not My Mother is a debut feature is astounding. Dolan has effortlessly stamped her name within genre film, in a similar way to both Rose Glass and Prano Bailey-Bond did with their respective first films Saint Maud and Censor. For years men have been seen as having a stranglehold on the horror genre, but as these three women prove, the future is most definitely female and set to be all the more terrifying because of it.
You Are Not My Mother
Summary
Kate Dolan’s feature debut is a masterclass in tension from its bold opening to it’s bittersweet conclusion. A fantastic new entry into Irish cinema, and yet further proof that the horror genre is in very safe hands as attention finally shifts to female filmmakers giving it their all.
You Are Not My Mother was reviewed at FrightFest Glasgow 2022. Signature Entertainment presents You Are Not My Mother in UK Cinemas and on Digital 8th April.
